For months, my counselor and I worked toward dealing with my emotions instead of shoving them down into the acid that sat in my belly along with all the bad memories. At the bottom of all the junk in my soul, I found grace, resolve, understanding, and forgiveness — for my mom, for my ex-husband, but most of all, for me.
For years, I believed exactly what Christine Caine’s quote says: God can do in a second what you have been unable to do alone for years.
But it only led me away from Christ.
We wish for it, but unfortunately, God usually doesn’t change our circumstances in an instant.
“Where did this dog come from? Is she coming home with us? Can she sit in my lap? What’s her name?” I adjusted the rearview mirror, not wanting to miss a single detail of his excitement. “Yea buddy, she’s your new dog. Merry Christmas.” For the moment, I was his hero.
But that wasn’t always the case.
I am so honored to have my first article published today with Good Men Project. The story of why I stopped criticizing the church was a huge turning point in my life.
For several years, I looked back at certain times in my life, playing the blame game. But now, I am no longer living as a victim. I have parents I am extremely thankful for and a church I love. And I have learned a lot along the way.
I experienced my own personal Sodom and Gomorrah when I was three. I’ve learned a lot in the thirty years since then. One of the biggest lessons is that saving a life requires more than just tidying up. A friend of mine, another victim of abuse, said something to me recently that changed my life forever.
By the age of twenty, my feet had touched the soil of three foreign countries to share the Gospel with lost souls, not even realizing that I was just as lost as every barefoot foreigner I had witnessed to.